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10 Ways to be a terrific parent

got his ladder out, climbed on top of the roof, went from one end to the other and then came back down and said, "Yep, it's damaged, we'll have to fix it." He then said, "We'll be back."

Oh he came back alright, four weeks later! And when he did, he only did a partial job and then left again. These shenanigans continued on for weeks. I wanted desperately to fire him but I had no one else who would come and the roof needed to be fixed. After being polite and patient the first few times (I didn't want to tick him off and have him leave for good) I finally had enough. I called him up and left a terse message. I even wrote him a flaming email that got his attention. Sure enough, he came the next day and finished the job. In the end, we got our roof completed. What should have only taken a day, took over ten long and painful weeks. When you say you are going to be there or do something, do it. Don't lie and don't procrastinate. If you can't do it, then be honest enough to say so and don't commit to it. And if you do commit to something and a situation arises, have the decency to let the other person know. They will understand and forgive you. Don't leave them hanging and coward off. It makes you look bad and puts a black mark on your good family name.

When you tell your child you will be there for his or her school play or sporting event or pick them up from work, be there! If you don't, your child quickly learns that your word doesn't mean anything and three things happen: one, your child loses trust and confidence in you; two, your child internalizes your "mishap" or "lie" as them not being important enough for you to be there; and three; your child learns from your poor example and pretty soon, guess what starts to happen? Instead of your child coming home on time, he or she begins to come home later and later and uses the excuse, "I forgot" or "I was busy." Hum... does this sound familiar? It should. You taught them this, remember? And you didn't even realize it! Be there and your kids will be there for you.

10. Teach and Lead.

Every single day presents new learning opportunities, not only for you as a parent but for your child. Always seek to teach and lead whether the situation is good or bad. As parents, we are quick to point out the bad and teach the right but seldom to we praise the good moments and reinforce good decisions that are children make.

As a parent, learn to have faith and trust in your child. Allow them to make mistakes and to learn on their own from those mistakes. Guide your children through situations and have them discover for themselves what the correct choices or decisions they should have made. Point out to your child what would have happened had they made a better choice or decision so that they can visualize the outcome at their own level.

As you teach, always remember to lead. Lead by example and through encouragement. Learn to walk-the-walk and talk-the -talk. Children would much rather follow your actions and behaviours than what you say. Talk is cheap but actions speak volume. Lead by good example and your children will follow the leader. Lead by bad example and your children will still follow the leader.

Always be thinking, "How can I better lead my children and be a better parent?" In most cases, your children will teach you without you even knowing it. The secret is to listen and observe, ask questions and take genuine interest in them and their lives. When you do so, you will grow as a parent and as a leader and so will your children. Learn from each other and you will learn to be better.

Troy

Parenting With Results

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